He was my best friend and probably the greatest friend I’ve ever had. Toxic Friends Don’t Think About Your Feelings. . She would text me but was never much of a caller (except her family, she’s 41 as of today and I am 36) unless I asked to talk. The individual I mentioned at the beginning of this post did all of the above and more when she found out her best friend was dating someone she didn’t like. We had been on a few teams together but one team we got into together was a very important one. She stopped playing with me, texting me, and didn’t invite me into any of her activities. Rules and tests you never know about until you cross the line one day. But we haven’t been together that long, or it just doesn’t make sense to me why I … I’m not sure if what you meant by being in the same position for 13 yrs – as in same friends? Ask your self, and decide why someone else has gotten your goat and you just don’t want to let them win?! Why would you send someone incessant texts or leave messages where your words are there for prosperity to find? He told me he wasn't pushing me away, just between us need distance. CRABACCA did you ever say something to him? Than we would always forgive each other, and be friends. She was a very good and sweet friend in General. Once that is attained or accomplished, you are no longer needed and are tossed aside. 5. Years later she messaged me on Facebook and I found out she’d gotten married. she has been having struggles with her home life but i has been helping through it. Were you dragging others into it? Unfortunately for me I wait until I’m furiously mad/hurt and feel wildly taken advantage of and my boundaries have been pushed to the limit so much that I need time to cool off and think about the best way not to offend them but in the meantime they always call 500 times and get furious with me for not responding. (1974-2020). is like saying I’m in love with you and want to be with you. I just want to know what your advice would be.I am poor and unemployed. "This shows that your friend doesn't respect you and your time, or you are no longer a priority in this person's life," says life coach Patti Sabla, LCSW over email. It's worked out well, I talk to almost none of them, and that's fine. Basically we had moments of really closeness, she seemed super interested in our friendship and we talked on the phone quite often like 1 or 2 times a month, when she went out for trips I asked her if we could talk about what happened and how it was, so our calls were anywhere from 10-70 minutes long. As we get older, we make new friends and gradually drift away from some old friends, but some people stick around for years, even if they aren't good for us. Even if someone might be interested in you otherwise, there's very little chance he'll strike up a relationship if he's actively … You might have been the cause of the cutoff. It gets tiresome and after a while the normal person at the recipient end of your self-induced drama will realize that they need to set some boundaries. Sometimes the reasons aren’t as dark as the ones listed above. In the song, Destiny’s Child is chastising this girl for doing what she does, and they end … I mean she was a good friend. 45 years of my life has been washed away. I, up until just recently, had a best friend of 45 years. We had sleepovers, play dates, google hangouts and all of that. But ever since he found out about me hanging around her (they were a few months into a relationship) she’s not made time for me anymore, which will be 14 months. Developing feelings for someone always changes the game. This girl is a liar and a schemer who latches on to them to try and get up in the world. I am a retired MD and went through this in June after a 5 year close friendship. My personal experience was I would tell her a secret or tell her about my fears and she would find a way to make those fears come to life and would tell everyone my secrets. It will still hurt, but at least I was proud to call her a friend. 8. (I’m going to call her Jane) Jane had been showing some signs that I thought were red flags. Extra space could mean cutting in half the time you spend talking to them. "D rop hints and look for signs the feelings are shared," Bennett said. Thank you. In friendships and relationships, disagreements and rows are common, depending on your dynamics. Every time I text her and she responds (She doesn’t normally respond. Even if you may have special reasons for cutting someone off, my point is that it’s extremely poor behaviour to cut someone off and leave them in the dust with no explanation whatsoever. It will hurt you, too. I was always there for her and we’d never had a single argument since we met in middle school. !…but it’s not worth my time. I wonder why and I kept on thinking about it and it made me sad. The fun you used to have with each other is replaced by a general awkwardness created by the vacuum of his or her unreciprocated feelings for you. No anger, blaming, jealousy and all of that, It’s done suddenly and abruptly without warning, usually with no reason or no explanation given, There was no prior communication or sign that this was going to happen, It’s always, ALWAYS one-sided, leaving the other quite blind-sided, The damage usually cannot be reversed, and both parties rarely become friends again. I need some serious prayers. I thought of her family as my family, Her daughter was my Goddaughter. But they’re quick to lose their cool when you step on their toes. Sounds like you are only thinking of yourself and denying that you had anything to do with it. 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